Submission Isn’t a Dirty Word


Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands as to the Lord… OUCH. There are probably fewer words in the Bible that are less comfortable. Yet without these words and the ones to follow marriage is a nightmare perversion of what it could be.

I typically preach and teach to men from a man’s perspective. I will and do hold men more accounatble for the sucess or failure of their homes than I do women. Yet for some reason the words “husbands love your wives even as Christ loved the church” seem to sting much less than the word submit does. So ladies, cut me some slack and read on. The reason that I believe the word submit stings so much is two-fold… 

  • Pride, plain and simple pride. The verse prior to this one should take the sting away, “submitting yourselves one to another” and yet it doesn’t. The direct instruction from the Lord is wives submit to your own husbands. How shall we view such a pride destroying passage? How about this one… Phil. 2:5-11 “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men.” All for the glory of His Father and the redemption of His creation. Did Jesus kenosis make Him less than He was and is? Did Jesus setting aside of His godly attributes make Him any less important? Without Jesus submission to the Father, we would be lost and without hope in this world. Submission is so like our Savior and is nothing to be ashamed of! Living as Jesus did is and should be the aim of all believers.
  •  Poor and sometimes abusive teaching. This may be unpopular among some preachers, but wives are to submit to their husbands as the church is to the Lord Jesus Christ; the perfect man who gave all he was to her. Submission is the ultimate act of trust in the heart of a woman to the man she has chosen to marry. Some preachers have mistakenly presumed that the Lord expects the wife to obey every sordid command of an abusive husband and that she should be a carpet for his dirty sinful feet. But as that man leads counter to the Scriptures he is no longer acting as the husband-leader under Christ but is acting anti-Christ. Now what the Scripture teaches in the word “everything” it means every area of life. There are no partitioned areas of life that marriage does not touch just as with Christ there is no partitioned part of our lives that he does not rule over. As the man leads like Jesus the wife should follow like the church does. This is extremely important in this day of such divided priorities and lives. The truth is that marriage affects and should affect every aspect of our lives. A wife that has hobbies and a career out of the home should have both of those under the leadership of her husband. There should be consensus in all that we do in and out of the house.

Next time I will speak toward the husbands and their duty and devotion to the daughter of God that He has allowed him to steward. Guys, if the words “love your wives as Jesus loved the church doesn’t chill and thrill you, you have missed the point and aren’t living or loving worthy of the treasure God has entrusted you with!